GOPHER BITES

(Music: HOLD ME TIGHT, Lennon-McCartney) (info./disclaimers [0]) (glossary [0]) (index [0]) (gardening guide [0])

I feel uptight now ...

Gopher bites
Tell me these are the only ones
And then I might
Know that my garden's not undone

But gopher bites
And bites
And bites
Make me blue
Blue, blue, blue -- ooo

Gopher bites
I see plants tremble violently
Then with great might
They disappear entirely

'Cause gopher bites
And bites
And bites
Make me blue
Blue, blue, blue -- ooo

Oh gopher bites
All through the carrot bed I had grown
They've got the parsley and the broccoli too

It's such a fright it's ...

Gopher bites
Three dozen plants become just one
As if in spite
They're ruining my garden fun

When gopher bites
And bites
And bites
Make me blue
Blue, blue, blue -- ooo

Oh gopher bites
All through the cabbage and the kale
They've got the parsnips and potatoes too

It's out of sight it's ...

Gopher bites
I think I'll try a trap or two
And then I might
Have a crack at seeing the season through

'Cause gopher bites
And bites
And bites
Make me blue
Blue, blue, blue -- ooo
Blue -- ooo

Comments: Another self-explanatory Beetless tune. Gophers tunnel, and like the taste of roots. "Gopher plant" might possibly repel them if planted in a solid block all the way around one's garden, but in most situations it has proven useless; gophers simply eat everything else. It's only fair to note that, if you don't mind growing food for them, gophers do help break up and cultivate soil, improve drainage, and create freshly-tilled mounds for seeds to sprout in.